“Oh that I knew where I might find him! that I might come even to his seat!”-Job 23:3
“Are you ok?” Often I have asked this question, and I have been asked the same. What does it even mean: “ok”. I suppose we mean to say: Are you well? Are you healthy, prospering, stable,“ok”. Many times the reply to this question is: “yes.” Perhaps we are “ok,” but perhaps, we are not. We are not ok and we simply don’t want to get into it. To admit weakness. To dredge up the past, or darken the present mood. Perhaps we don’t trust the one asking with our secrets. Yet inwardly we are shouting: “Oh that I know where I might find him! That I might come even to his seat!”
It is in God's providence to withhold Himself from mankind. He is not our waiter. He is not our butler (although many modern day sermons would characterize Him this way). There will be times when God does not feel as near as He once did. Where He must be sought diligently. When a child is young, it is criminal to neglect the smallest need. However, as the child grows to adolescence it is injurious for the parent to meet every need and rob the child of that remarkable teacher called responsibility. At some point they must learn to lean on the teachings set before them. They must trust even when they are not near. Sometimes God’s providence has brought us to a place of waiting. A place of stillness, a place of solitude; and that will do just fine to be our teacher. Yet other times our own neglect has placed us there. Our own sin even. It is the better part of wisdom to know the difference. The scriptures lead us to wisdom. They command us to “draw nigh,” “seek the Lord,” and to wrestle with God as Jacob did proclaiming: “I will not let you go until you bless me.” Job proclaimed: “O that I knew.” He desired an audience with God. Though his desire was un-met, his resolve did not change. Saying later in the same chapter: "Neither have I gone back.” Perhaps you/we are “ok”. Perhaps not, but are we resolved?
The holidays can be bitter sweet. We all have something to be thankful for, however many mourn a loss this week. Many sit down for Thanksgiving dinner and see an empty chair, and a reminder of what is never to return. Some are too overwhelmed to be jolly. Too burdened to be merry. Painfully thankful. They are simply not “ok”. Happiness is a fleeting moment, not a continual state of being. This may be you this year. It’s “ok” to not be “ok”. Perhaps a far better question than “are you ok?” is “are you resolved?” Resolved to serve God. To seek God. To obey God. To suffer for God. Resolved to His providence, His will, and the glory that He will get out of your life. Not “ok”, but resolved to trust Him all the way.
